Always Remember Your PRIDE

Well I have bared my soul. Seems like I had a minor issue. It really wasn't a bad weekend. I can hold up the last post by saying this much at least. My weekend went to hell when my mother told me that she put my brother as her beneficiary for her life insurance. That killed my spirit. So a lot of my weekends anxieties and second guessing came from the insecurities that my mother recreated within me.


However,


Friday

I left Baltimore at 1:00pm en route to NYC. My expected time of arrival was suppose to be 4:30pm. I guess that thought was shot to hell when I was at exit 8 on the NJ Turnpike at 4:15pm.

All the while I am reading the fabulous Alphonso Morgan's, SONS . First, I would like to say, that book was the bleeping bomb. I was so into the characters at the end, that I started yelling and crying. That is a review without a spoiler.

N E WAY. I finally got to NYC, after 2 naps and a tour of the Lincoln Tunnel, at 7:00pm. It was then that the driver of the bus said "if you would like to get to NYC before 4pm it is best you take the 9:00am bus." Yeah, thanks. Next time I am going to take the Metroliner like I usually do.

But I was highly late. I didn't want to miss one of the events that I came for so I headed straight for NYU. I got there at what was roughly 7:30pm. There I heard cutting edge conversation, commentary, and debate over issues of the media portrayal of the African-American LBGT in America. The 2 things that I can remember about that forum was Jason Cooper, and how he talked about the R. Kelly, over exagerated "In the Closet", and Katina Parker, with her playing frisbee in the park with her partner. I then got called out of that forum to tend to a Physics exam.


Bright and Early Saturday Morning....

Or shall I say front and center afternoon...

I got up to my mothers voice beckoning me to talk with her. I always love a good talk with my mom. This time we had a few familial issues to tend to. We had our talk and somewhere in between a conversation about doing right by her, and caring alot about her she dropped a bomb and kept going. I will live to come to terms with what she said. I guess that set the mood for the day so it definately had to change.


So I make my way to Astor Place, and walk until I remember where the Nuyorican Poets Cafe was. Of course I needed my Saturday afternoon walking music courtesy of yours truly(namely I was singing to myself while walking.)

When I got in the door I was very surprised, but pleased, that my name was on the list. I don't often get that treatment. I was greeted by a familiar face when I walked in, Master Frank L. Roberts he greeted me and directed me to sit in ans have fun. I flowed right in and had a great time. I got to see Alphonso Morgan and James Earl Hardy. I was also put on to the likes of Hanifah Walidah, absolute talent for days. I was totally overwhelmed by the talent and artistry of the afternoon.

I was anxious to meet Mr. Morgan since I had just finished his book, and it was hot in my hands. I made my way outside and saw familiar faces. I wont say them all so that they are not incriminated if they didn't want anyone to know that they were there. However, I met them. Bloggers, that is, that I have been associating with for the past couple of months. Kool beans.

After, Frank hosted an impromptu early dinner at a soul food restaurant on 3rd Street. Well if I needed just another reason to slap my momma than that was the reason to do it. Cause the meal was scumptuous and the portions OMG, to die for.

After the episode of Alternitive Soul Food. It was time to part and make our way into different parts of the city. A group of us walked towards the west village. We had a great time with conversations that touched a little bit of every topic, highlight the touching. What was even funnier is that we became loiterers on a street corner, hanging on a light post for about an hour. We suddenly had to retreat, I walked another blogger to his destination and my day was ended in the village.

I was then summoned one again to take my Physics exam (yeah I had like 3 to take all weekend, online.)

I found the internet cafe on 40/duece and got to crackin. I messed up a little but somehow I think I will survive.

After that I went home. I was tired. Damn, I was in NYC and got home b4 midnight.


Next Posts:

Sunday @ Luke & Leroy w/7

The Distinguished Gentleman himself Frank L. Roberts: Renaissance Man.

I will be in St. Louis all week. So if I don't get back here to post b4 Monday. Ya'll have a Safe Independence Day.

I'll be Home.... If only in my Dreams!

Protocol given I have to give much respect to everything I felt this weekend.
It was a wonderful weekend filled with Soul Food, Good Folks, and fun.

I had some major disappointments. Some were family related, some were just me going plain ole' Divo crazy.

I have a weeks worth of posts coming, so be gentle. Each comment will reflect a different aspect of my weekend.


So I will start with a piece called:

MY PEACE HAS BEEN SHATTERED

The events of my weekend were good. However there was this feeling that I had. The best way to express this feeling is through an old 1961 film I saw this weekend entitled: "Tammy Tell me True".

The main character is a girl reared on a shanty-boat called the L&B. She docks into a town where she might find an education. She wants to learn Public Speaking and Current Events.

She, being raised on the river, was not in sync with the status quo. Matter of fact her speech was that of an old southern or Elizabethan style.

She experianced so much joy among the people that she met. She was responsible for changing the viewpoint of many people in the town. A downside is that she experianced a great deal of ridicule from her classmates for being different and aloof. They didn't open up and recieve her until she came right out and told them about their ways.

"Divo, Tell me True"
I have been out of touch with the SGL life status quo. I apologize for not seeming to fit in as a piece of your puzzle. It was my selfish wish to aquaint myself with folks that could help reignite my soul for a lifestyle that I once lived.

This entry isn't to slander anyone, you should know me better that. However, I learned somewhere that whispers exert an identical property as talking. Which means that they both cause a vibration, sound waves that can be heard through reverbaration. Be careful, when you whisper, it causes the person you are whispering about to hear what you are saying full and clear.

I know remember why I somewhat hid myself away from this lifestyle and it's relations. I am afraid of us and our vices.

I would not commence praise on the weekend until I bared my soul.

Now,

I regain my composure and recollect my peace.

ONE WORD

Please leave a one word comment that you think best decsribes me.

It can only be one word. No More.

Then copy and paste this to your journal so that I may leave a word about you.

Nocturnal Emissions of "Simply Flawless"

When you smile
it’s as if God himself has painted a rainbow in the sky.
The fullness of your lips are like ripe fruit
And your tongue moisturizes them like dew.

When you gaze into my eyes
Time is lost to me, or at least I think
Cause you are staring and undressing
And caressing, what a blessing

When you smile
You just don’t know
How my flesh wants to feel
Your subtle vibrations
Or a gentle sensation,
only a kiss will do

When you gaze
I am amazed that you
Don’t go blind as you see
All the things you do to me
Maybe you do, but I am too lost in time.

When I’m with you
I must not make haste
I want to live off of your aftertaste
And then be based by your grace again.

Smile for me
Gaze at me
Be mine eternally.

Paris, January 9, 2003

You will exist in my sunshine
as Saturday begets the newer Sun.
Our lives together yet begun
for the flowers that bloom
from the very breath of you
oh, how I long to see
the dynamic in you

I shall never quite dream
in such vivid color and
extra post human art
I see all there is to see inside
and have stepped outside to applaud you,
My special honey chocolate mint
dipped in Gods kisses, mon amour

Do I long for you Septembre upon Septembre
or wish you there under my christmas tree
And even thought the world be around me
I dream in black and white seulement of you.

Mon amour, le père of my lifeless solitude
rescue me when I am lonely
fill my heart with joy unwaivered
you be my silent nocturnal emmission of light
down the path that leads to bliss

Show me, comment dire, I love you and miss you
in every language
help me to admire you always as what you are, art.

Envelope me into solitude with you
and touch me on my heart with my own hand
never leave me alone from myself
but rather let me learn of you (of myself)
grow happy with you, comfortable with your scent
in and out of sight.
Be my companion in my private life
you are Saturdays moonlight
where the Aurora Borealis shines

This midnight shall not be my last
Loving you.

"I am the Teacher, You, Are the Student"

So as I dreamed all night how I would teach, such a beautiful recipe of the sweetest cream of masculinity wrapped up in God's own gift wrap for skin, I was late to my appointment to meet the man that I will call Simply Flawless.

I was asked by Simply Flawless to work with him with his vocal talents.
I mean, I didn't know a lot about him. One day he just walked up to me and asked me to give him lessons. He told me that he wanted to have someone work with him that wasn't going to bail out on him. I quickly told him that as a traveling artist who is focused on school and performances that it would be hard but I would try to make it work.

I didn't really think that he was being quite serious, since in the next second he was trying to get me to join his telephone service business. Suspect? At least I thought so. So I thought nothing of his request, only that it had been asked.

About a week later this 5'9", Honey-brown, full lips, and vision of extreme sensual ooze came to me and asked me with out hesitation: "When are we going to get together?" Ok. So my heart is in my timbs. I mean what straight boy in all of his manhood walks up to another dude that is pressumably gay and say that. But I thought no more about the question as I did the intention of it. He was really into asking me for something that he wanted and I was really trying to figure out how to accomodate him.

Well once again he asked me to give him voice lessons. I told him I didn't think that he was really serious, only because the last time he asked I gave him my number and he never called me. So I am busy thinking he changed his mind. He told me that he didn't call cause he was busy with his business thing but he was thinking of me to help him with his music thing. So I confirmed being able to give him some instruction. He asked me when, I wasn't quite sure. So he really quizzed me about what I did, and where I would be at during the summer. I told him my vast schedule of travels. I told him that I would be free after July 4th and that he could have me any time after that. Did I really just leave myself open for that. He never budged. Well, he persisted that I find a time before the 4th. So I told him I would get to him on Friday. Which leads me to, today.

Aiight, It's 12:15 and I was scheduled to meet with him at the music building at noon. Well I called him, some girl answered, I was over it in a hearbeat. I asked for him, he came on and said he was on his way.

So he gets there and he greets me with this cute hand wave. Which is funny to me, cause if you see a guy who looks like this wave at you as if he was gonna holla at you, you would be scared to. Butterflies. My Stomach. Oh, hell I have a lesson to teach.

Ok. without giving all the details. When teaching, I have to look directly at the student. His smile is heartwarming, and totally hypnotic. So in teaching him breathing excersises, I had to do what? Go and place my hand on his midsection to show him how to focus his breath through his diaphram. So the wonderful midsection( my fettish) was fabulous.

His singing is good. He has some tonality problems that he has to work with. But if he gets the right type of people behind him you may hear him on the radio, or see him on the tube.

I am so glad to be working with him, although I am intimidated by gorgeous men.

But I guess as he continues to flash his radiant smile.

I'm the teacher and he's the student.

Why I Sing

This thing we have
is like heaven to me
I'm feeling so high like a kite
you really have me on a string

When you whisper sweet hellos
straight from your lips to my heart they go
and then from there I feel like opening up
but all I can think of saying is:

Beautiful creature that God has given to me
you've got to be blind if you don't know
what you really done for me.

But before you close your eyes
and before you go to sleep
Can I kiss you boo on the small of your neck
and caress your back while I sing.

Even as you lay here
in the middle of the night
You are a rainbow of perfection
cause your colors are so bright
So while you are sleeping
if you don't mind
I 'm going to write to you how I feel
and sing you a lullabye.

Baby you don't know
what you've done for me
How the glaze of your eyes
are like heaven to me
Baby you don't know
what you've done for me
You're the reason why I sing.


DivoLusc.

TOAST TO MY OWN REUNION, THE ESSAY

Here it is the long awaited, so how was it story, of my 10 year class reunion.

Registration at Fiorello H. LaGuardia happend at 3pm on Saturday June 11, 2005.

I got there and I was looking for the sign that said LaG 95', but I didn't see one so I went to one of the tables for another year and asked "Where are the tables for LaG 95'?" I was told that I had to look for the sign that said LaG'95. Now, I knew that I had graduated with a diploma from HS and I wasn't stupid after all I was in my senior year of undergrad, so I know she wasn't telling me something that I could have told myself.

N E Way. I was finally directed to a desk near the security station. What did I see an envelope that said LaG 95' on it with a sign that said the same but it was upside down on the table. Go Figure. Ok, so I tell the nice graduated dance major my name and class. He hands me a welcome packet and proceeds to do something else. So I have no idea what I am suppose to do. Until, I look in the welcome packet and there is an itenerary. It says we are suppose to meet in our respective class rooms. LaG 95' was suppose to meet in room 561N.

Now I was a student long enough to know that if a room has a 61 behind it, it's a studio or a closet. So, I proceed downstairs again to talk to the guy and ask him where my class is suppose to meet. Which is when I seen my first classmate. First of all, ten years is a beautiful thing for attractive high schoolers. He was insanely goregeous, but I just nodded and called his name. He was like "Hey!" I asked the woman at the table if she could tell me where the Class of 95' was to meet. I told her that the room in the brochure was not there. She then told me "Oh you must have got an old version of the itenerary." So she gave me the new room 645W and I went there quickly to see if anyone else had shown up.

When I got there, there were about 6 of my classmates from that year in the room. I knew two of all. But I came in and introduced myself which I really didn't have to do cause I had this big sticker on me that said Kenneth "Latif" Alston "95. So they called me by name when I walked in the room. I brought that people obviously looked different than they did in HS so I pulled out my yearbook for about 30 -45 minutes we were going through the book talking about the pictures that we saw and matching them to the folks in the room .

Every other class had their own refreshments of some sort. We didn't we were too busy stealing from the M&A class of 55'. I mean they gave us nothing. We were feeling like second class citizens. That is when we started to talk about how we were a indignant class and the administration was always on our cases because we were all really rude, crass, insensitive to the rest of the school we just did what we wanted. Hell, what did they expect we were seniors and our class was fabulous in both music, art and the performing arts. So we had a feeling that things were going to be shady all night.

So it's time to eat. We are all walking around like blood thristy hounds looking for the cafeteria that our reception was going to be held in. I mean there were only two, other than the teachers cafeterias that the 50th Class reunions were being held in. So we looked at our itenerary and it said to go to the 7th floor cafeteria. Imagine, 12 alumni walking in sync towards the cafe and the person at the door says "What class? " and when you tell them they say "Your class is suppose to be on the fifth floor." Ok, so I guess it's downstairs we go. We get downstairs and the very same thing occurs we notice that there is no place settings that say LaG 95'. So we are pissed off now. But the classmates that I had with me were very unfamiliar with my low tolerance of BS. So when we got to the 7th floor again the Asian girl came to the door and said what class and I told her. Once again we heard "You are not suppose to be here, you should be on the 5th floor", that is when I said " What I am going to need to to do is find out exactly where our class belongs there is no table marking for us downstairs and none here either, you are going to have to find out for us before we all get pissed off." I have my classmates looking at me now as if I had turned into the class representative. So she walks away.

As she is walking away I see about 8 more classmates from my year. I immediately yell out LaG 95' and we all bumb rush the door start talking to each other. I told them the situation. Then I said " Look them tables don't have any designation, lets go get em' bump protocol" guess what 95' was back in effect. That is how the night started.


Somewhere through the stealing of seats and the frustration of not having our own place we found ourselves like first in line for the buffet style food. Now, may I be the first to say that the food was poor quality. Ok, I was the one to say it. Myself and about every other classmate on the line. We were through. But I found that we were bonding through our disgust.

I thought that some of the African-american students would bail out on me, but to my surprise there were about 5 there already when guess who walks in. Our senior class president and former Miss. Johnson C. Smith University 1999. So I was screaming my head off. This girl told her sister to tell me she wasn't coming. But there she was in the flesh looking fabulous. All of the sistas that came back were doing it something special. The brothers that came back were doing it something good too. We just had it going on. We started to see some of the instructors that we had during that time and taking pictures.

We headed down to the Senior Chorus and Senior Orchestra concert. All of the black students kinda gravitated to one another as we did in the mid-90's. That was when I seen the one of the only Jewish guys in the whole school that made my life happy everyday cracking up all the time, I mean he wasn't the only but the best. Kaback, I can't believe that he came back for reunion and when asked why he had a wonderful and quite sexy tan he said "I just came in on my boat", in the words of Paris Hilton, "That's Hot!"

The Concert was good, although I missed the singing of the school song that is based on Bramhs Concerto in Cmaj. I was off looking for one of my teachers for an umbrella. Did I mention that it was raining as if the devil had gotten married to an archangel and God was mad.

Off to BBQues.

BBQues, is a LaGuardia tradition, stemming back to the first gospel chorus concert that happend in 1984. So it wasn't a big surprise that everyone wanted to go. It was now about 17 of us, black folk from 95' ready to go and eat. Now, I knew that there was gonna be a wait if we came in with like 15-25 people so I did a reservation over the phone for us, 25ppl. When we got there I went to the host stand and told them my name and my friends were like we put in for a table already so I was like OK cancel mine. Well they weren't ready to seat us and that is when Kaback decided to go and buy a round of drinks for the group. Wow, Kaback, there you are getting us drunk like you did back in the day. So we were getting restless and still waiting for some more people. But we opted not to wait for them to get seated immediately.

As soon as we got downstairs we got to the table but there still wasn't enough room. There were some empty tables next to ours and we asked the hostess if we could sit there. She said "No. This is for a party of 25." as soon as I heard this I started laughing and went to the hostess and asked her the name on the party of 25 she said Alston. I was like, I am Alston and this is my party it's a little smaller than 25, but this is what we have. My classmates were looking at me as if I had just delivered them from pharoah in Egypt.

The best time of the whole night was that fact that were down there in the lower part of the restaurant. There was another party there that we quickly found out was LaG's first graduating class, the class of 85'. So all night there was much love being spread around. Most memorable of the whole night was that 85' had challanged 95' by singing a song that the Gospel Choir sang in their year. They were fabulous, especially since they haven't really been singing together for 20 years. Well when time for 95' to represent we didn't have a choir so. The Class President chose me to represent the class. I sang "Give Me A Clean Heart". None of my classmates that were there had heard me sing in 10 years but 2. So they were amazed at how my vocal ability had grown.

One of the 85' ers came to me and said "If you are any indication of what LaG produced after 85' then we definately know that you have upheld the legacy."

It was at that moment that I knew that all of my excitement for being at my 10 year was good. It's good to be apart of a legacy. I pray for the ones that came after us, and the ones after them.

I feel it coming together
People will see me and cry
I'm going to make it to Heaven
Light up the sky like a flame
I'm gonna live forever
Baby Remember my name. Fame

The Winner for "Host With The Most" Goes To!!!!!!!

Some call him Nathan, Some call him Seven, Some might not have figured out what to call him yet, but if you wanna know who has it, and by the looks of things, ain't gonna lose then you have come to the right place.

Ladies and Gentleman,

When one comes to NYC he need look no further than the future of entertainment himself Got Nathan, "The Host with the Most." I spent two wonderful evenings in this brothers effervescence. Surely I had not met him before our meeting on Friday so I hit him with the most corny pick up line like : "I see you have a seven on your shirt, you must have a thing for the # 7." Well, at least that got me to know who he was.

You can definately find this brother with great energy and an a smile to boot.

He will work a room with pizazz. Make sure you're looking good cause he will make sure that if you are at the function that it will be documented for him, as he carries his trusty digi-cam.


Friday was nothing but a mere movie screening that he invited me too. It wasn't his event so to speak but you couldn't tell me that, cause all the people that were there had some sort of tie to him. Eery, not the least he's just loved that way.

I thank him for introducing me to the gentleman that I will call Gucci. It was Seven that encouraged Gucci and I to go uptown for the Black Mens Exchange (BMX) Discussion.
Hey Nathan if you hadn't sent me uptown I would not have gotten a chance to get information about my first BF. (kisses to you)



STUDIO 7 @ Luke & Leroys.................

When I tell you that Miami may have been hot on Sunday, but Miami didn't have anything on Studio 7 on Sunday.

When I got there I knew I was early. I am not social like that anymore. But, I knew it would be great. I delved right in to order my first drink. You know you are at a great social bar when you see a scortchin hot bartender and you forget your own regular drink.

Ok, So the drink was off the chainz, but I had to get something to eat. You know to keep up the endurance.

So, I arrive back to L&L and to my surprise a full house, damn and it's only like 8:30pm. I see all of NY finest. Now it would mean a lot to me especially since I don't get to see them all the time.

From the time I walked into the door there he was "The Host With The Most" just making his rounds. Dj was blazin hot on the 1's and 2's ( do you still call it that when they dj with cd's. ) Aight bump it.

Then I hear all of this laughter as folks are reading a piece of paper being passed aroung by a dude named Cordell ( ah ha I figured it out after like 2 hours). It was a game that Cordell brang with him called 20 Questions where you had to find 20 different people that fit the description of the questions that were asked. You had to get 20 different signatures. Which would mean, you betta have been social or you weren't getting your paper filled out.

Sample Questions:

7. Who would you like to have a threesome with?
10. Who do you think you are going to have sex with?

My all time favorite:

15. Who do you think would turn you out?

Not to mention the questions like:

16. Who do you think has a big dick?

So the atmosphere was definately off the Hizzy for Sheezy.

Outside HOT!!!! Inside HOTTA!!! so to sum it all up Studio 7 is HOTTATTA!!!

So all of you folks that are traveling to the Mecca of all Prides in NYC. Will definately regret not showing up at 21 7th Ave.

That is all for my field reporting.

Till next time remember,

Life is what you put into it, when we live it to our fullest, our reward is limitless.

I'm out.

I TOAST TO MY OWN REUNION, Prologue

I sing the body electric
I celebrate the me yet to come
I toast to my own reunion.
When I become one with the Sun. "Fame", The Motion Picture

Well, I am preparing for what, to me at least, is going to be another great experiance to occur before the Summer Solstice.

In the year of our lord, Nineteen Hundred Ninety-Five, life began a new for the gentleman known as DIVO. His experiances have been very vast and he has become quite accomplished in these years. The springboard to the great life that he would live would be the home that he found at Fiorello H. LaGuardia High School, The High School of Music and Art and Performing Arts.

A little history. LaGaurdia HS as it currently stands is the joining of two schools chartered between the late 30's and late 40's. These schools were mostly created out of the love of the arts and the vision to have students excell in that area.

Widely remembered is FAME. Fame is a movie that was based on the real life school of Music and Art.

I was very priviledged to go to one of the most prestigious arts academys in the country of its kind. (Public Arts)

Well, on Saturday and Sunday I will get a chance to revisit my High School Alma Mater. I am excited for many reasons. I want to see who will come. I want to see what some of the folks look like. I wanna know the folks that stayed with their craft. Mostly, I want to see the people that helped to define who I am today.

Nostalgia has started to settle in and I have pulled out my yearbook at least two or three times a night. The population was very mixed and I don't expect to see all of my African American collegues their, although I am scheduled to meet with som of them for dinner and cocktails after the Senior Semi- Annual. Although it may be a bit bitter sweet, because I had the money to pay for all the activities and I damn well should want to go back, but not all of my friends from HS agree with me. I won't let it get me down. I know that a school cannot thrive without the support of its alumni, and I refuse to let a legacy that I was a part of die.

I am truly in utter excitement as I remember the lunch lines, hanging in the hall with the Sweetheart, singing at the drop of a dime, every one always in performance mode, high style fashion, tears of joy at concerts, flirting with the straight boys (that flirted back), fighting the straight boys' girlfriends, the thought of getting 1 dozen roses from a senior my freshman year, me being the director of the gospel chorus for two years (my life dream at the time), the group of students that always had a scripture when I looked at boys, the thought of some of my friends when I annouced that I would have a girlfriend, being able to be Bisexual because it was in.

Whew!!!, I can go on and on. But those are the memories that come back when I think about LaG. It was my strength for the real world.

My Theme song for the week is:


Baby look at me
and tell me what you see
you aint seen the best of me yet
Give me time and I'll make you forget the rest

I got more in me
and you can set it free
I can catch the moon in my hand
Don't you know who I am

Chorus:

Remember my name...
FAME

I'm gonna live forever
I'm gonna learn how to fly, (High)
I feel it coming together
People will see me and cry

Fame
I'm gonna make it to heaven
light up the sky like a flame (Fame)
I'm gonna live forever
Baby remember my name.

Everlasting Love

Where there is grief, there will be hope
And if ever a hand is in need,know that I'll be holdin' on
Know that the peace that comes from above
is the same everlasting love

Remember me whenever you're all alone
And if it helps you to sleep know that I'll be looking on
Know that the peace that you dream of
is the same everlasting love

I remember a time I couldn't close my eyes
I would lie awake dispairin'don't know how many nights
Afraid of death that my chest would give way to the fear
Pulled the covers over my head and I cupped my ears

In attempt to escape the deafening sounds of silence
In attempt to escape these constant visions of violence
and with death as close as it could possibly get
heard a voice in the distance sayin' Kenny not yet


I came prepared, to lift my voice, to sing and shout, to cry, to moan, to uplift the name of God.
I was not ashamed. I will never be ashamed I have been through too much to not praise. I have so much to recall that the only that I can do is submit.

Saturday, June 4, 2005 was the continued blessing that I had been praying for. CeCe Winans. Just the thought of saying the name of a woman that has so willingly allowed her audiences to be ushered into the "Throne Room" of God.

My life has been made brand new. I am a creature that is chosen by God to do a work. I am continuously reminded of my assignment. Even when I don't know that I am on my task I am constantly reminded.

As I attended, what I knew wouldn't be a concert, I let all my cares go and allowed myself to focus on all that God has and is continuing to do in my life. As CeCe continued to breath words of comfort and grace on the audience, all I could feel was the ever increasing embrace of the Holy Spirit. I was washed completely in the love that I sing about. For once, I wasn't singing, I was being ministered to, in song.

I will not hold back here. This is a "Chronicle" of my lifes events. I can make no excuses. All that I can say is that I am blessed. Better than I need to be. Better than I deserve.

I have been a recipient of Gods "Everlasting Love"

The Circle of Life

From the day we arrive on the planet
And blinking, step into the sun
There's more to see than can ever be seen
More to do than can ever be done

There is far too much to take in here
More to find than can ever be found
But the sun rolling highThrough the sapphire sky
Keeps great and small on the endless round

It's the circle of life
And it moves us all
Through despair and hope
Through faith and love
Till we find our place
On the path unwinding
In the circle
The circle of life


It's 7:52pm and the curtain is set to rise in eight minutes. Knowing the theater they usually make their final announcement at about 8:05pm. I am very gitty. I have waited for this moment for a very long time.

See last year about this time I did some promotional singing for the production of The Lion King. We were promised tickets to the Baltimore show and somehow never heard anything else about it. Well, on Tuesday after my long nap after my Monday slumber from my long weekend in the Big Apple, I got a call saying "Kenny, do you want to go and see the Lion King on Thursday?". I suddenly erected my body from the sacred slumber that I was in and said "Sure !"

I was not prepared fully for the experiance that I had this evening. The scenery, lighting, costumes, choreography, precision, story line, special effects, all had me spellbound.

I have seen a couple of Broadway favorites, but this will go down in history for me for days and years to come.

The more I thought about the lyrics to Circle of Life, is the more I became enchanted with how it has so much to do with my personal life story.

So finally here it goes so bear with me.

I equate the beginning of the song to the beginning of my matriculation at Morgan. There was so much to see and so much to do, and I wanted to do it all and for the most part I did.

I mean I got there and I was away from parents, old friends, inhabitions. It was time to have fun.

Long story short, all my fun led to what should have been disaster.

I found out my Sophomore year that I was HIV+. Some of you may say "Darn, that must have been hard." Well, yeah in a simple form but there is more that makes this story glorious.


The song goes on to say:

There is far too much to take in here
More to find than can ever be found
But the sun rolling high
Through the sapphire sky
Keeps great and small on the endless round

Well I had to find myself, through a couple of years. I thought all was good. Bam, in the middle of my last 3 semesters, I found out that I had PCP Pnuemonia and Regular Pnuemonia. I should have been taken out but I wasn't. The thought of being disassembled for 6 months was frightening. I wasn't even able to lift my voice in song for about 3 months. I was devistated.

However, I found some peace in knowing that it all happend for a reason. I mean, I had never had the experiance of being in the hospital, ever. I had always had good things going for me with a reasonable struggle. But now, I would have to rely on others strength to rehabilitate me.

The fact that I am in school pursuing my degree is a miracle. A fluke accident. I didn't have the money. Aid wasn't rolling in. All of my scholarships had dried up and it didn't seem as if I would make it.

Somewhere along this 6 - 12 month rehabilitation, I was liberated. I was able to secure housing, get disability, have a part time job, pay off my defaulted loans (into repayment), re-secure my scholarship, recieve in-state status for tuition purposes, recieve a hefty refund for my semester, recieve a 3.5 semester average the first semester, finish 2.9 semester average the second and now I am tackling Physics with 12 credit hours to go.

It is truly the Circle of Life. I was led today to embrace the movement of that circle on my life. I usually try to illuminate that to the others that I am in contact with. Am I finish with struggle? Probably not. Will I have my days? Well, of course. But the Circle is what keeps me grounded.

Side bar to Trent * Now I am being Deep*

I don't expect pity. I have learned to live up to my mistakes. I have learned from them and made them my footstool.

One other group of lyrics that has me in tears right now: From The Lion King.

Shadowland

Chorus:
And where the journey may lead you
Let this prayer be your guide
Though it may take you so far away
Always remember your pride

As always in Parting,

I came in Peace and I leave you in Solemnity.

Why Angel Boy Divo

This is the story of how a mild mannered guy gets the name AngelBoyDivo.

When I was dating a girl in H.S. she always referred to me as Angelboy. Pretty much because she said that my singing and personality were very angelic to her. So I only reserved that for her use until other people started to catch on during the early years of my undergrad.

During my first 3 Sophomore years, (that is approximatley how long I was a sophomore) I met a Professor that was so amazed by my talent that she knew that she couldn't call me DIVA because of it's female connotation so she made up ( in her mind at least) DIVO.

When I was contemplating writing my own books of poetry I decided that I wanted to name it something snazzy, so I decided that I would name it The Diary of an Angel Boy Divo...

If you call me on my phone the # is 410 - - - DIVO. (You didn't really think I would leave the # did you. WHEW !!!

But if you are ever privileged to get the number and call and you don't reach me you will reach my service that will tell you that you have reached the Home of Angel Boy Divo Entertainment. Which is my way of keeping people abreast that I do run a business of music promotions.

Well that is the story it wasn't much but at least everyone knows where the name comes from.